Apple made a lot of announcements at its event in September. New iPhones, of course, an iPad Pro as predicted, plus of course the long-awaited Apple TV update with apps. But there were a couple of other things that caught my attention, which might have been overlooked.
Before we begin, cast your mind back to the heady days of 1997. Gil Amelio was CEO of Apple, the company was the poster child for the word ‘beleaguered’, and the only people who watched its product announcements were the dedicated faithful who were there in person. Like me.
Back in 1997, I attended Apple’s Worldwide Developer Conference, at which Steve Jobs (who had only just returned to the company with the acquisition of NeXT and had no real formal role) gave a ‘fireside chat’. It was a Q&A, at which developers were invited to ask Jobs whatever they wanted.
One person asked what was going to become of the Newton. (Remember the Newton? No? It doesn’t matter.)
What matters is that Jobs talked about portable technology and having your personal data with you wherever you go. But he said one thing that sealed the fate of the Newton, and I quote, “I don’t want a scribble thing”. The statement was accompanied by a contemptuous gesture of scribbling and throwing away an imaginary device.
Jobs reiterated his objections to stylus-based devices numerous times once he became chief executive and after Apple went into the iPhone and iPad business. He really, really, really didn’t want a scribble thing.
Fast-forward to September 2015, and Apple introduces a scribble thing. OK, it’s called the Apple Pencil, because that presumably tested better with focus groups, but it’s still a scribble thing. It’s not the first stylus designed for iPads, but it’s the first one from Apple. Granted, it’s nifty and it’s got some cool tech inside, but it’s a scribble thing.
What’s more, the iPad Pro, for which it is designed, appears to include no way to store the scribble thing for safe keeping. Most stylus-based devices have such a facility (including the hilariously easy-to-break one on the latest Samsung Galaxy Note) but Apple doesn’t think you’ll need that. It’s like Apple knows you don’t want a scribble thing either, so it’s made it really easy to lose. You won’t have it for long.
OK, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but what about the little cap on the end that you remove to expose the Lightning Connector to charge your scribble thing? I guarantee you will lose that. Guarantee, warrant, promise, vouchsafe, swear and declare — that sucker’s a goner.
How do I know? Well, do you have any pens at home? Do you know where all the lids are? Moving on.
The upgraded Apple TV looks like it will be a winner, and may even give traditional gaming companies a run for their money. That’s nice to see: competition is good.
(On a side note, when Tim Cook stood on stage and said, “The TV viewing experience hasn’t changed in decades” you could hear the disbelief in the audience. Even he looked a tad incredulous reading it off the prompter. The TV experience has radically changed in recent years, which is why a thing like the Apple TV is necessary. Someone needs to check the stuff the CEO has to say on stage so he doesn’t look like a nitwit.)
Among its many gee-gaws, the forthcoming Apple TV features a remote control with Bluetooth and a rechargeable battery and Siri and a touch-sensitive interface as well as buttons. It looks really nifty.
But how do you go at keeping track of where your TV remote is at home? It’s an ongoing adventure around my place. The present Apple TV remote is a cheapish aluminium thing that’s easily lost and costs $29 to replace (though I usually just use my iPhone so no real drama). A quick calculation on the comparatively complex tech in the new remote suggests that its replacement cost will be a number greater than $29. An app along the lines of ‘Find My iPhone’ – something like ‘Find The Goddam Remote’ – might be in order. If it has sound capability.
If not, be prepared to search the sofa cushions. The remote’s probably in there, somewhere with the scribble thing.
Matthew JC Powell is a technology commentator, philosopher and father of two, in no particular order.
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